A man walks into a drug store with his 8-year old son. They happen to walk by the condom display, and the boy asks, “What are these, Dad?
To which the man matter-of-factly replies, “Those are called condoms, son. Men use them to have safe sex.”
“Oh I see,” replied the boy pensively. Yes, I’ve heard of that in health class at school.” He looks over the display and picks up a package of 3 and asks, “Why are there 3 in this package?”
The dad replies, “Those are for high school boys, ONE for Friday, ONE for Saturday, and ONE for Sunday.”
“Cool” says the boy. He notices a 6 pack and asks, “Then who are these for?”
“Those are for college men,” the dad answers, TWO for Friday, TWO for Saturday, and TWO for Sunday.”
“WOW!” exclaimed the boy, “then who uses THESE?” he asks, picking up a 12 pack.
With a sigh and a tear in his eye, the dad replied, “Those are for married men. ONE for January, ONE for February, ONE for March…..”
Well this isn't what I thought that this was going to be about, so let me make it so....
How many of you insecure possesive women type keep a count of the condoms so that you can start a fight about one "missing" and that this "missing" condom is concrete evidence that your wooped man is cheating?
Stupid wrote: Well this isn't what I thought that this was going to be about, so let me make it so....
How many of you insecure possesive women type keep a count of the condoms so that you can start a fight about one "missing" and that this "missing" condom is concrete evidence that your wooped man is cheating?
Not me, I just poke holes in ours........
__________________
"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment." -Ralph Waldo Emerson
Moldy wrote: Stupid wrote: Well this isn't what I thought that this was going to be about, so let me make it so....How many of you insecure possesive women type keep a count of the condoms so that you can start a fight about one "missing" and that this "missing" condom is concrete evidence that your wooped man is cheating? Not me, I just poke holes in ours........
Stupid wrote: Moldy wrote: Stupid wrote: Well this isn't what I thought that this was going to be about, so let me make it so....How many of you insecure possesive women type keep a count of the condoms so that you can start a fight about one "missing" and that this "missing" condom is concrete evidence that your wooped man is cheating?Not me, I just poke holes in ours........Oh, I thought that you already had him trapped.
Not trapped...blessed.
I asked him if he wanted another baby the other day. He said he had to think about it. Lucky for him, I was calm and just said, ok. The end of that. No need to nag him about it.
My eggs are rotting though.
I turn 40 in October.......
__________________
"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment." -Ralph Waldo Emerson
Moldy wrote: Stupid wrote: Moldy wrote: Stupid wrote: Well this isn't what I thought that this was going to be about, so let me make it so....How many of you insecure possesive women type keep a count of the condoms so that you can start a fight about one "missing" and that this "missing" condom is concrete evidence that your wooped man is cheating?Not me, I just poke holes in ours........Oh, I thought that you already had him trapped. Not trapped...blessed.I asked him if he wanted another baby the other day. He said he had to think about it. Lucky for him, I was calm and just said, ok. The end of that. No need to nag him about it.My eggs are rotting though.I turn 40 in October.......
40!!!! that is too old to be pumping out a litter!!
Stupid wrote: Moldy wrote: Stupid wrote: Moldy wrote: Stupid wrote: Well this isn't what I thought that this was going to be about, so let me make it so....How many of you insecure possesive women type keep a count of the condoms so that you can start a fight about one "missing" and that this "missing" condom is concrete evidence that your wooped man is cheating?Not me, I just poke holes in ours........Oh, I thought that you already had him trapped. Not trapped...blessed.I asked him if he wanted another baby the other day. He said he had to think about it. Lucky for him, I was calm and just said, ok. The end of that. No need to nag him about it.My eggs are rotting though.I turn 40 in October.......
40!!!! that is too old to be pumping out a litter!!
Exactly.....the chances of multiple births increase with age. the body is pumping out eggs left and right....fertilize this one...this one....
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__________________
"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment." -Ralph Waldo Emerson
And then your kid(s) will have to tell the other kids on the playground that s/he doesn't live with their grandparents, that you really are their mom. Oh yeah, they might have flat faces too!!!
Stupid wrote: And then your kid(s) will have to tell the other kids on the playground that s/he doesn't live with their grandparents, that you really are their mom. Oh yeah, they might have flat faces too!!!
Nooooo.....women in my family tend to look younger than they are.
I can deal with flat faces......no problem.
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__________________
"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment." -Ralph Waldo Emerson
Stupid wrote: Well this isn't what I thought that this was going to be about, so let me make it so....
How many of you insecure possesive women type keep a count of the condoms so that you can start a fight about one "missing" and that this "missing" condom is concrete evidence that your wooped man is cheating?
Nope .... not me .... don't have to use them ... don't have to ...
Inside Out wrote: Stupid wrote: Well this isn't what I thought that this was going to be about, so let me make it so....How many of you insecure possesive women type keep a count of the condoms so that you can start a fight about one "missing" and that this "missing" condom is concrete evidence that your wooped man is cheating?Nope .... not me .... don't have to use them ... don't have to ...
Not being an ass, but, speaking from experience, I hope that never comes back to haunt you.